It’s not really unusual in itself – it was just more than usual last night.

F is away and, whenever he’s away I seem to have a bad night.

Last night it took me aaaaaaaaaaaaggggeeeeeeeeeees to get to sleep. I went to bed about 10.30 but probably went to sleep about midnight.

And, at 3 I was wide awake!

I got up, had a drink and a few cigarettes and, about 5, went back to bed.

But I didn’t sleep and got up about 5.30.

Of course, now, as I write this, I could sleep forever.

When I walk, my legs feel like tree trunks – big and heavy. My eyes are gritty and sore. My slight headache has gone (thank goodness) but I know that everything will be a real struggle today.

I feel, in a word, like crap.

I hope nobody crosses me today. My temper will be short.

Bah!

p.s. and the weather is crap too. Colder and rainy and miserable – (I suppose it is September) – which does not help my mood at all!